Things heard in a modern day elementary classroom-
-“I love cupcakes!” says a young girl. “How can you like cupcakes? I thought you were Gluten Intolerant.” asks John.
– A concerned 11 year old. “Todd, can you please listen to what they are talking about at that table. I think they are saying that I am a Trans-Jester person.”
— CHILD ONE- “Did you know that Jesus is a real person, he was the son of God?’
CHILD TWO– ” Yes, I know he is real but not really real. I mean he does not live down here with us”
CHILD ONE- ” Well, he can live here but we just won’t see him.”
CHILD TWO– “And…did you know that Jesus has an older brother? His older brother is Zeus.” said with conviction.
– During my free period I was listening to the Ottis Redding Pandora station. Joe walked in (7 years old) as Sir Duke by Stevie Wonder was playing. “Oh yeah, this is my jam!” was his response. AGE 7 -2017
– “Papa, I just poked myself in the eye. Is it still there?” Age 4-2017, my son Sparks
-“Look Todd, I drew half a margaritta.” Age 7 – 2017
-Our director was away for a days and a 6 year old was wondering. “when the director is gone who is the Head Mistress?” Age 6- 2017
-If the plural of octopus is octopi
And the plural of goose is geese
Is the plural of deer
die? Age 7
– Me, jokingly- “anyone who drops too much play dough on the floor has to eat it with hot sauce.”
The response- “um, Todd ins’t that kind of racist?” Age 8 and 42
-“ I actually feel like myself today” Age 8
– “My dad’s job is to fart and fix things around the house.” Age 4
-While having difficulty reading a book, ” I can’t read, don’t you know I have sexleptia.” Age 6
–A Poem by a Boy- age 7
Be creative in life.
Everyday is sunny.
Night is dark.
–“My aunt is sort of fat. Oh wait that is not nice to say. My Aunt has a real big belly.” Age 8
-I asked a boy, “So have you decided on a Halloween costume for this year?” His reply. “Well, I think I am going to be that guy that wears a black cape and has that large pitch fork thing, but I can’t remember his name. Oh, I remember. I am going to be the Grimm Reefer.” Age 6
“Todd, John has a tic-tac up his nose and he can’t get it out!” I looked up there but couldn’t see anything but he said that it felt like it was up there. His mom took him to the hospital to let the doctor look up his nose. Sure enough there was a tic-tac up there. The doctor easily removed the stuck candy from the boys nose. John, looked at the tic-tac and said, “well the orange never got stuck up there before.”